Music: {allcanada} Fedoruk hopes to make impact on Canucks after recovery from drug and alcohol abuse

You have to give Todd Fedoruk (notes) credit, he isn't shy about discussing his drug and alcohol addictions which he says were the real reason he was bought out in Tampa in '09, ending his NHL career unless he should happen to catch on with the Vancouver Canucks this fall.

He says he's been clean for nearly 18 months now, is in terrific shape and is ready to drop the gloves as part of the role he has to play if he's going to be a regular in the league as he has been for nine seasons, most of those with the Philadelphia Flyers.

But after the death of Rick Rypien (notes), Derek Boogaard (notes) and Wednesday Wade Belak (notes), the Canucks might be wondering what they've got themselves into and whether they can give the poor guy a legitimate chance after what they've been through as an organization.

Fedoruk of course has had many legendary fights, the most devastating being the shattering of his face by the late Derek Boogaard in October of 2006 when the prospective Canuck was in Anaheim. It had to be rebuilt by the doctors and then he was knocked unconscious for nearly four minutes by Colton Orr (notes) in another one but he says he'll still be willing to throw them if necessary, although skating and hitting are going to be his main focus.

"The doctors tell me that the guys are so big now and hit so hard that it (your face) is going to be broken whether it's been rebuilt or not," says Fedoruk. "I know that's something I'm going to have to do every now and then, there's just times when it needs to be done. It's part of my game. I think I got a little bit away from that when I was in Tampa. I had this sense of entitlement there, that I'd somehow earned the right not to have to do it anymore. And I used the facial injuries I'd had as an excuse not to have to do it anymore. But the game doesn't work that way."

Fedoruk was out of hockey all last year and he says the lack of interest shown by NHL teams was the best thing that's happened to him. The year away from the game allowed him to assess his priorities and mend his relationship with his family which is wife Theresa, son Luke 7, and daughters Sienna 5 and Sloane 10 months. A lifestyle which will allow him to be a good father and husband are his priorities now.

"I needed the time away to mend myself, get to know myself better as a person, and realize the re-lapse happened because I got away from the disciplined things I'm always going to have to do to stay right mentally once it's a part of your life. I thought earlier in my career I hid it pretty well but Tampa was where it all started to relapse and being out of the game really let me take a look at myself. I had serious drug and alcohol problems. Alcohol was the drug of choice I suppose but I wasn't particular, I'd go for pretty much anything that was in front of me, the whole array. I wasn't shy and didn't say 'no' to much.

I spent a year focusing on the things I need to do and it was a long time before I was even interested in hockey or even watching it

"I'd been keeping myself in decent shape, but not to the point where I could play until July when I started to get the itch to play again. I talked it over with my wife and some friends who are close to me and they said they thought it would be alright. I asked my agent (Brad Devine) to see if there was any interest. I wasn't expecting a contract of course, but I was hoping for a tryout and I was actually a little surprised at how quickly Vancouver showed some interest. It was only about four days after I spoke to Brad that they called.

"But I'm a long shot I guess. I'm going to have to open some eyes and I'm going to have to do that by being quick enough to make some hits and be responsible defensively. I don't think getting there will be a problem. I'm skating here with the Flyers kids and staying up to them."

Fedoruk began training with Jim McCrossin close to his home in Cherry Hill, N.J., and if he can play at anywhere near his top level, he'd have a chance to catch on with the Canucks given their lack of toughness up front.

"The time away gave my body a chance to heal and now that I'm back in shape it turns out Vancouver could be a great fit but as I say I've got to get noticed. I'm no good to any team unless I'm hitting and doing it clean. I think I have a good reputation with the officials that I want to hit but do it the right way. You can't be taking penalties."

Needless to say Fedoruk saw himself to some extend in the death of Boogaard this year given they fulfilled the same roles in the game. He wasn't available to speak on Belak's passing. He knows full well that Boogaard could have been him, because he had an alcohol addiction by the time he was 20 and thought he had it under control only to find it and a few other problems had him under control. But hopefully what has been such an unhappy outcome for these families will be a big lift to the one Fedoruk heads. He says players who do his role don't always feel they fit in on a team which is why they may have the problems off the ice that so many of them seem to be experiencing.

"When you make a big hit or you've got somebody's back on a team there's no better feeling, you fit in and you're helping," says Fedoruk. "That's the feeling you're looking for. "